It's a tough song.
There's a clock tick -tock -tock
tick -tick -tockin' on the wall
And I've got a blind date
for the Warrantor Rock n' Roll Ball
But I can't find my shoes
and I hear those rock n' roll songs
I can't wear a dinner suit
with a worn -out pair of thongs
I found me pointy toed cowboy boots
made with crocodile skin
And I twisted and strained
to get my big feet in
And I was thinking of the girl,
was she nice and you know,
what was my chance?
When I tore the crutch right out
of my brand new pants
So I pulled on my jeans and my thongs
and I said, what the heck?
If they don't let us in,
I'll take you to the discotheque.
So I'm walking
up a driveway
feeling like a boy in his teens,
when this big mongrel dog
tears the right leg off of me jeans.
Come on, get out of it,
come on, sit down here, I'll kill you.
So with blood on my shin
and my right knee sticking out,
I rang on the door,
determined to take her out.
Well, you should have seen
the size of the bloke that
answered the bell.
He said, hey Shirl, come and see what things is going to take out our little girl. Hang on,
alright, I like your little puppy dog.
Well, I shrunk to the size of a dog
and I lowered my tail
And I faded into the shadows,
sad and pale
Well, there's a
moral to the story, mate
Be a sport and let me know
Meanwhile, I'll just go home
and tune me fiddle Rosalie Bow
Thank you very much.